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生活 - 专栏

友谊的小船如何才能不翻?五项潜规则不可忽视

Awdhesh Singh 2017年02月07日

It's quality over quantity

对任何人来说,朋友都是最珍贵的。如果有人身边有好朋友,我觉得他是真有福气。每个人都希望能有好朋友但经常可遇不可求,因为并不是每个人都了解友情背后的潜规则。下面我试着列举一些。

1:共同价值观

我的人生经验是,如果朋友之间有共同的价值观,友情就能持久。诚实的人与堕落的人,勤奋的人与懒惰的人之间很难保持友情。不要仅仅为了扩大交际圈,或是拓展个人兴趣交朋友。

2:价值观互补(原文Complimentary意为赞赏,结合下文意思不通。疑为笔误,应为Complementary)

朋友的价值观也不能跟你完全相同。朋友要在某些方面与你互补,这样你会觉得因为有他陪伴而满足。他应该指引你走向正确的道路,犯错时及时批评。

3:情感联系

友情中必然有爱的成分。只有与一个人建立情感上的联系,才能成为真正的好朋友。有人提到他的名字,你都会不自觉地微笑。所以说友情也是一种化学反应,你不可能跟所有人都来电。

4:重质不重量

没人能维持一大群朋友。如果有人朋友遍天下,也不可能有精力成为任何人的好朋友。只要身边有一位真心朋友,足以让生活变得非常美好。

5:勇于为朋友挺身而出

老话说“患难见真情”,这话一点没错。所以,如果你要交朋友,一定要在他最需要的时候挺身而出。如果朋友落难你却躲得远远的,肯定当不成朋友了。 (财富中文网)

作者Awdhesh Singh是作家,也是国税局官员,以上源自Awdhesh于问答社区Quora上的回答。

译者:夏林

Friends are the greatest gift to any human being. I consider a person truly blessed, if he has great friends. We all want great friends but often can’t have them because we don’t really know many unsaid rules of friendship. Let me list a few of such unsaid rules.

1: Common Values

It is my experience of life that when friends share common value, the friendship last forever. The friendship between honest and corrupt, hardworking and lazy can’t live long. Don’t make friends for networking and furthering your personal interests.

2: Complimentary Value

You can’t have friendship with someone who is exactly like you. Your friends must complete you in some respect so that you feel more fulfilled because of him. He must be able to guide you in the right path and even criticize you when you are wrong.

3: Emotional Bonding

There is an element of love in friendship. You must be emotionally attached to a person to become his true friend. The mention of his mere name by someone must bring smile to your lips. Friendship is thus a matter of chemistry as well. You can’t click with everyone.

4: Quality over Quantity

You can’t have a large number of friends. Someone who has a large number of friends can’t devote his emotional energies to fulfill the obligation of a good friend. Even if you have just one good friend that is enough to lead a blissful life in this world.

5: Standing with Friends

It is wisely said that ‘a friend in need is friend indeed’. This applies to you too. Hence, if you are making friends, be ready to stand at the time of his need. If you don’t stand in his bad times, you lose his friendship forever.

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