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碰到抢话王怎么办?这些绝招帮你避免同事打断讲话

财富中文网 2016年12月06日

下次碰到你讲话总被打断,不妨试试以下妙招,保证让大家听清楚你说话。

你在开会,刚开口分享之前精心准备的好点子,还没说几句,有个同事就插嘴把你晾在一边了。如果你经历过这一幕,你就会明白在2009年MTV音乐录影带颁奖礼上,泰勒•斯威夫特被饶舌歌手坎耶•韦斯特打断获奖致辞时心里是什么滋味。

每当会议开得热火朝天的时候,任何人的讲话都可能被打断。不过大量研究显示,女性被打断的情形比男性频繁。最近一份研究发现,在一段时长3分钟的对话中,男性打断女性讲话的次数为2.1次,女性打断男性的次数只有1.8次。有趣的是,女性打断同性说话的可能性大于打断异性的可能性。

抛开性别不谈,要是有人打断你发言,就意味着你的话还不那么重要。但升职竞争时,最好能让人记住你讲过有分量的话,而不要给人留下你的想法似乎不错但可惜没说完这种印象。求职网站Monster为此咨询专家,寻找有礼貌(却坚定地)守住话语权的方法。

掌控个人观点

美国康涅狄格州职业咨询公司Ellia Communications创始人凯西•卡普里诺建议,如果有人在你解释精彩观点的时候插话,不妨等此人把话说完,然后讲完你的见解。接下来,用一种实事求是,但并非责备的口气,提醒大家你是在接刚才被打断的话。

她举了一个例子:“谢谢,弗雷德。我想说绕回去,把最后一部分讲完,因为这对讨论很重要。”

“关键是树立你的权威,体现你的自信和对话题的熟知,不要被干扰带偏,”卡普里诺说,“但要以一种恭敬、冷静且令人信服的方式把它表达出来。”

采用放大策略

如果对方是一个出了名的抢话佬,你可以找个同事合作,白宫女性雇员就常用这一招。方法是一位女士先讲一个要点,接着另一位女士紧跟着强调并赞同。

巴尔的摩职场导师瑞秋•安杜哈尔提出了类似的方法。她建议用“同盟机制”,事先找个盟友。“你和一位同事可以彼此支持各自的观点,保证大家都听到你们的发言,而且可以相互确证。”安杜哈尔说。这样一来,你可以不显山露水地表达观点,又顺便帮了同事,实现双赢。

说话要自信

花点时间客观评估你的讲话方式。职业和生活方式咨询网站WORKS面向80后90后的咨询专家吉尔•哈辛托提醒说,别忘了你选择的措辞、语气和语调都可能影响你的信心。她建议注意音量、口齿清楚程度,结尾是否用升调,以及表述是简洁还是啰嗦。(请不要用这种开头:“这可能不是个好主意,不过……”或者“我可能说得不对,但是……”)

如果你担心问题可能不是讲话的内容,而是表达的方式,不妨使用如今非常流行的媒体培训技巧。模拟会议现场,录下你的发言,留意你坏习惯,比如语速过快、频繁停顿、不能全面组织个人想法或者讲话含糊不清。

调整肢体语言

肢体语言不仅仅会影响他人对你的印象,也会影响你的自我感觉。哈辛托建议讲话时身体前倾,坐直。

此外还有一些策略,比如摆出身居高位者的架势,如“霸道大佬”式(双手撑在桌面,身体向前靠,就像政治题材美剧《纸牌屋》男主角弗兰克•安德伍德那样),或“精英首席执行官”式(背靠椅子,双脚稳稳站住)。这些方法不一定能制止别人打断你发言,但可能帮助你拿出勇气,更自信地谈论工作。 (财富中文网)

译者:Pessy

审校:夏林

You’re in a meeting and you’re ready for your mic-drop moment. You start to explain your winning idea, when you’re coworker interrupts you and steals the metaphorical mic. Now you know how Taylor Swift must have felt at the 2009 MTV Awards when Kanye West stole her thunder mid-speech.

In the heat of a meeting, anyone can get interrupted, but an abundance of research has shown that women are more frequently interrupted than men. In fact, a recent study found that men interrupted women 2.1 times over the course of a three-minute conversation and only interrupted men 1.8 times. Interestingly, women were also more likely to interrupt another woman than to interrupt a man.

Gender aside, when someone interrupts you, it implies that your statement isn’t valuable—and when it comes time to get evaluated for a promotion, you want people to recognize you for your good ideas—not your almost-good-idea-that-got-cut-off. Monster spoke to experts to find out how to politely (but firmly) take back the mic.

Take ownership of your idea

If someone barges into your explanation of your very good idea, wait for the person to finish speaking, then finish your statement, says Kathy Caprino, founder of Connecticut-based career coaching firm, Ellia Communications. Then, in a factual (read: non-accusatory) way, mention that you’re following up on your idea or opinion.

For example, she suggests saying, “Thanks, Fred. I’d like to circle back and share the final piece of my idea, because it’s important to the discussion.”

“The key is to establish your authority, confidence and know-how on this topic and not to get derailed,” Caprino says, “but do it in a respectful, calm and compelling way.”

Use the amplification strategy

If you’re dealing with a notorious interrupter, you can pair up with a colleague and use the “amplification” strategy, a tactic popular with female White House staffers, whereby a woman makes an important point and another woman emphasizes it and credits it accordingly.

Similarly, Baltimore-based career coach Rachel Andujar recommends developing a “buddy system” in advance. “You and a colleague can stand up for each other’s ideas to make sure that they are heard and are validated,” she says. Now you’re covertly claiming ownership and helping out a colleague. Win-win.

Speak confidently

Take time to think objectively about your delivery. Remember that word choice, tone and cadence can all undermine your confidence. Jill Jacinto, a millennial career expert at the career and lifestyle site WORKS, recommends paying attention to your volume, clarity, upspeak and whether you are concise or verbose. (And please don’t be the person who starts a statement with, “This may be a bad idea, but…” or, “I could be wrong, but…”)

If you’re worried the problem may not be what you say but rather how you say it, use a popular media-training technique. Film a mock meeting, and pay attention to any crutches like speaking a mile a minute, pausing frequently, not fully composing your thoughts or mumbling.

Adjust your body language

Your body language doesn’t just impact people’s perceptions of you—it also impacts how you feel about yourself. Jacinto suggests that you lean in and sit up straight when you’re speaking.

Other strategies include striking a high-power pose such as “The Loomer” (put your hands on the table and lean forward a la House of Cards’ Francis Underwood) or “The CEO” (lean back in your chair and keep your feet firmly planted on the floor). They might not stop someone from interrupting you, but they may just help give you the courage to speak more confidently about the work you’re doing.


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