给出有益反馈的3个基本原则

    而当你和“知道自己在做什么”的人一起工作时，提建议之前最好先措辞严谨地表扬。你随时都可能打击到对方的自尊。在这种情况下，最直接的建设性意见并非理想选择，比如“那样做不对，你应该这样做”；事实上，这样的建议肯定会遭到对方的抵制。

    那些能力足够，但远未达到精通的人，对批评最为敏感。要向比上不足比下有余的人提供反馈（更不用说在项目最后四分之一阶段提供反馈时），你最好用一点外交手腕。

    我渐渐发现，许多有创造力的人都非常善于自我批评。作家乔纳森•弗兰岑曾说过，他的书是“充满让人后悔的句子和措辞的雷区”。作家约翰•班维尔形容多年后重新阅读自己的第一本小说，“是一次可怕的经历……我不敢重新阅读自己的作品。我从生理上不能承受……我闭着一只眼睛，手指张开读完了那本小说。”虽然我没有机会接触这些作家，但我也从其他同样才华横溢的作家身上听闻过这种现象，这帮助我在指导那些正努力创作好作品的人时更为宽容。

    如果你认为反馈者的工作就是打击创作者、让他们服气，那你就想错了，有用的反馈绝不是靠批评累积起来的。创作之不易已经足以让人体会到自己的卑微了。

    你得到的最有用的反馈是什么？它为什么有用？欢迎与我们分享你的故事，我们期待你能提供更多细节。也欢迎大家分享那些毫无帮助或粗鲁的反馈。请通过电子邮件edit@wherewithalpress.com与本文作者摩根•赫斯特分享你的任何想法。

    摩根•赫斯特的“开卷有益”系列，主要探讨如何通过最简单、最有效的方法，重新考虑和调整我们的职场行为。（财富中文网）

    译者：刘进龙/汪皓

    审校：任文科

    When working with someone who already “knows what they’re doing,” however, you have to coat your advice with careful praise. The potential to bruise an ego is everywhere. The quickest constructive feedback—that’s not quite right, do this instead—is not ideal in such cases; in fact, it’s almost certain to invite pushback.

    People who are competent but not masterful tend to be the most sensitive to criticism. Anyone giving feedback to someone who’s good but not great, never mind in the fourth quarter of their project timeline, had better be a master of diplomacy.

    Over time, I’ve discovered that many creative people are highly self-critical. The author Jonathan Franzen once said his books were “minefields of sentences and word choices I regret.” The author John Banville described rereading his first novel many years later as “an appalling experience… I can’t bear to revisit my own work. I physically can’t bear it… I went through [the novel] with one eye shut, reading through splayed fingers.” Knowing and experiencing this phenomenon—not alongside these writers but equally talented ones—helped me speak more generously to people sweating from the effort of trying to make something new and good.

    Useful feedback never piles on criticism under the misguided idea that it’s the feedback giver’s job to keep creators humble. The effort involved in creation can be humbling enough.

    What was the most helpful piece of feedback you have ever received? Why was it so useful? Tell us your stories, the more detailed the better. Stories of spectacularly unhelpful or boorish feedback are also welcome. Please write to Megan Hustad at edit@wherewithalpress.com with any you’d care to share.

    The Useful series by Megan Hustad will explore the simplest, most efficient ways to reconsider and adjust how we behave in our professional lives.